Fiday,much better than Wednesday

Whoa…I guess it’s getting better. Wedesday was like 100X lousier than what is happening now. First of all the Bio test wasn’t that tough although I know I lost a few marks here and there but I will pass. And there was the long break and we used it to TC (talk cock). I really enjoy TCS (talking cock session), helps to de-stress and build friendship. But haha, I only TC with my group. Anyway I have identified 3 VERY distinct cliques already. On friday when we went over to 05V12 classroom, everyone just seperated into their cliques…I’m guilty of that but haha, no space left at my table so shift lor…It was fun sitting with the PRCs, I believe they are the most neglected. Must spend more time with them… So thursday was cool. And by the way, I didn’t punch the wall at home as I said I would in the previous entry. Saving my fists for Sailing training on Sat. THERE BETTER BE TRAINING!!!
Now friday, 31/3/2006. Tmr’s April fool’s day. So the CT of 06v12, Deejee, decided to play a little prank. Change classrooms. I thought this was a horrible idea. It would piss the teachers off cuz lesson time is wasted and I believe there is already some friction btw IP students and the teachers. Dun want to push them beyond the limit. But oh well, I’m just one guy. Can’t really influence EVERYONE right? So we ended up downstairs at 06v12 classroom. It was SOOOO NICE!!! Too bad we don’t have a $2000 budget to spend…If not our class would already have carpets and Sofas. ESPECIALLY SOFAS!!! We love sofas and cushions haha.
Then for every teacher that comes in we do something VERY lame. Like singng happy birthday, merry christmas and stuff liddat. People think it’s funny, I think it an infringement of personal right to "non-lameness". Can see the pissed off look on every teacher’s face. Joke sia. And for announcements during assembly, they had like 5 minutes of crap lo…Shitty, crappy, false yet REALISTIC announcements. haha joke…Then they made VJCO play the national anthem. Cool huh. But it was too soft. Well, CO is very soft and you need either an auditorium or a HUGE CO to hear them. But you can hear the suo na anywhere. And there were this bunch of clowns mocking the Victorian anthem. They went to play it rock style, and yelled it out, not sing. It sounded awful. Honestly, even Ronin sounded better than that hoarse clown on stage. VS guys will understand who is Ronin. It was a rock band that came to our school for teacher’s day 2005, it was a ripoff cuz the singer was cuckoo…I shall not explain further.
Then the day went very well. and not to mention today is VS SPORT’S DAY!!! Everyone was soo excited. I was excited cuz can see my frens, classmates were excited to see that bumbo-clown Chia. Finally after boring electives, I rushed down to the treehouse and went to scan the area for familiar faces. I did find my ex-classmates but Chia didn’t scold anyone so the fun is gone for those who came to see him. and he was standing at the other end of the grandstand, so we couldn’t see him from the treehouse. and the girls can’t just swaddle over to the other side, they’ll draw ALOT of stares lor…and I’m rather uncomfortable with 50% of the VS guys staring at one partiular girl or "my" girl. Haha. Chope already haha.
After like half an hour all hell breaks loose, it started raining, and it rained HEAVILY….There goes sport’s day, down the drain with the rain water. Everyone was packed in the canteen. Lols. so good time to chat, but not good time to get tau-poked. As I said I am un-taupokable, but under such circumstances I can’t be sure. But anyway I did save my neck. So as I said I AM un-taupokable. Muahaha. Anyway after chatting went back to class to meet PH and Cui Yue, we’re supposed to cut hair together but kena pang seh by them…Wha liao eh…Anyway rain so heavy I’m not going anywhere lor…So En wei went to borrow the truman show from Mr Chew and we watched it in class. So when the rain stopped I could finally go to the bus stop to take a bus to a salon in bedok. No details on cutting hair but I shall say it’s agonising and its really short now. If I am caught by any teacher for long hair he must be outofhismind. There, just an example of how short it is. You can see on manday anyway. Haiz…there goes my "longER" hair at the back. Nvm, hope it grows back by Japan trip. haha, hope my sideburns grow back too. That will take a while.
kk, that’s all from me…I’m much happier now haha, thanks and all praise to God.
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Wednesday blues… …Well it’s not really blue but you get what I mean

Yes, another day of sadness and depression. I now wonder whether there is a day or pure joy in the IP. Well, there cannot be joy when there is no hard wrok before it. Haiz, I will be really happy if I get good results for my Bio test. But happiness comes after a lot of hard work. A LOT of hard work. Well, about today, there are a few things that added to my sorrow today. The day started off well. Every day I come to class with a positive outlook, hoping that all will be well but it isn’t. I’m proved wrong most of the time…
During chinese class teacher was giving out the chinese assignment. And guess what 38/100. I knew I was going to fail but nothing can prepare you for the actual thing. My heart sank a little and I didn’t speak for the rest of the class unless spoken to or totally necessary. And then the chinese mock CA paper. 38/65. I passed yay! But everyone around me were getting 40+ and complaining. Okay…they just made my day. I think I’m developing some sort of inferiority complex over here. Sometimes I ask myself," What am I doing here?" "Did I make the right choice?" All sorts of stuff. And I’m seriously doubting my abilities now. I have nothing that can make me stand out. No special talent I possess. And if you think crapping is a talent that is crap. Crap isn’t going to get you anywhere. See, Ahmad and Yin Hong are respected for their artistic skills. Donovan, CK, Zhai Juan and Andrea are respected for their physical ability. The PRCs are respected for their math, science and chinese skills or abilities. Lisabelle and Yi Ning are respected for their command of the English Language. Keith is a Bio King and everyone just seems better. And I’m some small fry of whom no one wants to listen to even when I make announcements.
After Chinese lesson, math was a little better because the relief teacher looked like my Dad. Seriously. Interesting and spooky. Haha, Mr Daniel Ang is going to be my "dad" from now on. Hahaz.
The rest of the day went okay. Just went to relieve some stress by kicking a piece of cardboard hung on top of the lockers. It helps but not much.
Then came CT session. A mass error sweep by Mr Yang. There is nothing wrong with it but I feel very uncomfortable. Mr Yang did the right thing to point out all our mistakes. We can’t sweep them under the carpet forever. But that made my day. Number 1, Guys go cut your hair so that it does not touch the ears and slopes at the back. My hair doesn’t touch the ears but it doesn’t slope at the back. Worst thing is, when Mr  Yang mentioned guys having long hair, everyone just turned and looked at me. WHAT??? Am I some criminal now? Well, it seems that I am the only guy in class that sports longer hair but wth??? Oh well, it pains me to cut my hair. People might not see the logic but everytime I cut my hair, I feel like something is removed from me, and it feels like the barber or hairdresser is plunging that hateful scisscors right into your chest. It hurts. I hate cutting hair and I love my hair. Haiz… …Major depression… …Number 2, Mr Yang criticised the crap board. What’s wrong with it? It helps us to relieve some stress by having a little laugh every day. Does that hurt? And nobody uses that tiny board except Mr Koh. Of whom I clear the crap board for. But no one else uses it. Number 3. The cleaniness of the class is atrocious. And I feel that it’s my fault because I didn’t implement the class duty roster thing. It’s out but I did not implement it. Number 3 made me feel ultra useless. I guess some people are  right. All talk no action. That, I will change today. I don’t care if I become a dictator or what but if something has to be done it will be done. 
What a day for me. Finally the last straw, sailing training cancelled. That little ray of hope that I hang on to (it’s the only thing I’m looking forward to, honestly) is snuffed out. yes… no more sailing training. Feel like punching the wall right now. I have my sailing gloves, it won’t hurt. Just feel like punching the wall. There’s no one around but Yining. If I were alone, I would have broke down in tears…A man never cries but if someone or a series of events come and knock you over the head three times and you can’t get up. You can’t fight back, you can’t do anything. You’re physically bruised, mentally bruised and emotionally bruised. Imagine a scenario when you’re so helpless to a point where you can’t even struggle. That’s when even a real man will break down. I really feel like punching the tears and sadness out. But I can’t. There’s someone here and not in a public place… … I shall do it at home. Hope I feel better. The sadness is unbearable…
And I have come to realise something. Who cares if you have courage, perseverance, determination? Do you have what it takes for the job? Not academically inclined? You’re not going to get anywhere. It’s a cruel world out there and I feel that the only way is to bite back at it. No one is going to see the "innate" qualities that you have. They are only important for getting a pay raise, not for getting the job. That’s it. I have decided to be a fighter. No more drifting around and doing what the world tells me. I’ll fight back. I will fight for what is right. Right till the very end of the age…
Forget about perseverance and all the crap. What we need is a sacrificing spirit. As Yoda says,"We must learn to let go what we hold close to us." Sacrifice is essential. We must give something to gain another of equal value. Learn to let go, for the greater benefit. But we cannot sacrifice all that stand in our way. We would become cold-blooded freaks. But that is half of what I intend to be…
 
Elemental Fighter. For one who has lived in the darkness and in perpetual sorrow and has a broken life as his sword, a broken heart as his shield and shattered dreams as his strength knows no fear.  A force to be reckoned with…
 
I do not crave attention. I just want to let others know that I bite…and that will suffice…
 
PS. I think my tongue is getting shorter. I can’t seem to pronounce "colonialism" properly. What’s going on??? Not only do I have insufficient talents/abilities, am I losing what I can do as well???
Does anyone respect me as the secretary or treasurer? I may be crappy but that doesn’t mean I’m fooling around all the time. Ask the purple team ppl or Jun Han. Ask them how serious I can be when it comes down to work. donovan once asked me,"Thomas, are you EVER serious?" Then, I only smiled. I regret that, I should have said a strong YES. I want the class to know, I am their secretary. I respect them as much as I respect anyone in authority. But what I ask in return is not their loyalty, not their support. But respect. Where does loyalty, support, friendship all come from? It’s respect. All I want from them is just a fraction of what I give to them. When I give an announcement, how many are actually listening. When I make announcement about the class fund. How many actually give me the money the day after? You respect me? Search your heart and you’ll know that you’re lying except a few ppl of whom I know respect me, and I respect them as well. The rest of you…I have nothing else to say. Just this. In sec 2, I was treated like dirt. I have no respect and I have no control over anything, no one appreciates the job the secretary does. People scorn my efforts to help. What I want to say is this: I don’t want this to happen again here in IP now that there’s a change of people. Just give me a little respect okay? And brighten up my life so that I can brighten yours. Who wants a sad and depressed secretary?
 
I pray for guidance from above.
 
My new motto: A force to be reckoned with.

Monday – Physics test…

WoHo, today Physics test… Super scared lor…Physics is the only thing I’m good at, and if I flung or do badly for this test I will be like so screwed. Well, haha I had a covenant with myself. If i flung the paper I will bang my head on the wall 20 times. OUch, thats gotta hurt so DON’T FLUNG THE PAPER!!! Must do well!!! Argh, physics test is the second lesson. No point trying to squeeze anything into my head during chinese lesson cuz I’m already trying to absorb watever the teacher is trying to teach and I can’t afford to be distracted which I usually am. Haha, take a look at my chinese textbook and it’s filled with halo drawings, swords and medieval weapons and armour lolx…
Okay…now time for physics test the test that will determine the condition of my head…Mrs Cheng wasn’t around so Mr Boy came in to relief, or give us the test… I saw the paper. first question micrometer screw gauge…Bad news. "class you won’t be needing foolscap paper." VERY GOOD NEWS… Then the test began…I zoomed thru the paper as fast as Thomas does a physics paper, which is as fast as how he does it, which is as fast as… …Haha. It was okay. I didn’t know a few questions, not sure for some BUT ENUF TO KEEP MY HEAD from the brutality of the wall. Haha…I’m okay and will be okay…
And now…I shall blog about my crush in class. Hope my sis isn’t reading this but oh well it’s natural right? I’m not going to say who but I have been liking her for quite some time now…You will not know who is it because I have been very subtle…And it’s getting irritating in class. Everytime I’m bored my eyes will start to drift to so and so and the feeling is that kind of "aw…just look at her" kind of feeling. I don’t think you can express it in words but I guess this is the closest it can get. Okay enuf about my crush. I’m very proud of her anyway, she’s starting to talk more in class, which means she’s settling down. Which is a good thing. Haha.
 
Alright, just want to quickly write down this story I heard on Sunday during the sermon at church. It’s about the power of prayer.
Once there was this little conservative christian town. All of a sudden, a bar sprang up right in the middle of this town. The Elders of the church were greatly upset and they held an all-night prayer meeting praying that God will remove the Bar and so on…All of a sudden, lightning really struck the bar and it burned to the ground. The owner was furious with the Elders and brought them to court. The Elders kept insisting that it wasn’t their fault but the owner claimed that the Elders had prayed to bring this disaster upon his bar. At the end the judge said,"I cannot decide who is right and who is wrong but I have realised something: the owner of the bar believes in prayer but the Elders do not…
Has this been the case for many of us? Prayer is a powerful tool. It is a means of which we communicate with God and build relationships with him…I will never forget this story…

Sailing training. Index: 1

Yoz ppl, sailing training on Saturday. WhooHoo!!! My passion for sailing is UNQUENCHABLE. Muahahaha. I have been deprived of the opportunity for 2 whole bloddy years and I’m back in actioan. Muahahaha. I am unstoppable except by the traffic police. But sailing got no speed limit. Therefore no summon. Haha, unstoppable!!! Traffic police can’t stop me…Lols, anyway back to sailing. It was supposed to start at 9 am, therefore be there at 8:45.  I was so enthu that I came at 7:50. Actually I got the timing wrong but heck. I’m so enthu. And I was listening to the Halo soundtrack 5 times I just put into my MP3 (I have an MP3 hahaz) and exploring the place. Lols, when everyone came and after we rigged up the boats it was 10:30. That was really late but oh well. Anyway I was feeling really wierd lor. Me, a noob, among all the proded ppl who get like 5th to 1st in competitions…argh…Till the day I become like them. Haiz, anyway there were 7 420 sailers today. So my boat got 3 ppl. Lols. Move super slow and tacking was super clumsy.
Today I learnt about tacking. How to change sides quickly and effectively. I was told to do it within 1-2 seconds and I was taking like 5? Waddehell…Competition in June and I haven’t got my license and I suck at tacking. Wth…But Fawn, Fon (whatever her name was) said my sense of boat balance not bad. YAY!!! Finally something I’m good at. Whew, I’m not a sucker after all. And after a whole day of tacking and trapezing…we went back to shore. Trapezing is fun but it’s really tiring. My arm was aching after we came back. argh…but as i said. It was FUN! Lols, have a bath lunch and zabo!
But my parents who came to pick me up insisted that I get my gear today at the sailing shop at the NSC. So I got my gloves (FINALLY NO MORE ROPE BURN!!!) and my boots (FINALLY NO MORE "SLIP-UPS") yippee!!!
Haha, what a day.

Join the FLAG

Another shitty day in the IP, hm…days are getting shittier and shittier and more frequent. What did i do to deserve this??? VS ppl might be laughing their heads off lor… Haha, IP bastard VS blood traitor who ask you go IP? Huh? See what u get? Leave VS go VJ (or even worse TA) haha serve you right. Anyway Lang arts test and Bio microscopy test today. 2 tests on one day. WoHo!!! But it seriously sucks. I think I did well for Bio, I hope to get full marks for that one, it was really chicken. I believe many of the 06V13 ppl would agree with me. Then it was Lang arts test during EA period. Enrichment period for tests??? Why not call it CA day instead of thursday. Stupid right? Left. Of course it can’t be stupid. It’s SPASTIC, RIDICULUS, OUT-OF-THE-WORLD, MADNESS, RETARDED and so on. Honestly I didn’t prepare much for the test. I didn’t know how in fact. I refuse to memorise everything. There’s just not enuf grey matter to store the stuff liao. at least I have a brief idea on everything. ALMOST everything…
The test began at LT 5. I was tired and pissed at the fact that there’s a lang arts test. Well, the test started with a huge timer projected on the screen. 1:30:00 and counting down… …Stress lor…I think Mr Koh is a sadist. haha. Lols. Anyway I gave short and incomplete answers to everything cuz I dunno!!! I’ve never been good at this…And I forgot what Human liberalism was (if non-IP ppl, you’ll probably NEVER know what the hell that is)
So, I’m screwed!!! I just hope I get a postive number for my test. EVERYONE found it difficult. And to vent our frustrations, the guys started to punch, whack, clobber, stab  the domok in our class, it’s in bad shape now. Really bad shape…I took the opportunity to kick it and rip it to shreds…which I didn’t do. I just kicked it and made a few dents with my knuckles. Can’t seem to break the cardboard with one punch though…So sad. But it did help to relieve abit of stress.
So ppl, when you fee like hitting someone or something, whack  a cardboard box…
By the way, FLAG means Fail Lang Arts Gang. I might consider joining it soon.

Performance ZERO

Today was one shitty day…Kena scolded by our dimwitted PE teacher. That guy is quite interesting actually and he does make some good points SOMETIMES…Tell you all about him. That guy can spend half the PE lesson talking on soccer SAFETY before letting us play games AFTER a 2.4 km RUN. Er…What time is left for soccer? And another thing, he likes to use the word ‘minimum’ I think he’s obsessed with it. "I want you people to run MINIMUM 6 rounds aroud the track. mininmum" then he scolds us for only running six. Wierd right? And I think he’s a show off. During the mass guys-only scolding (not our fault we came in earlier than the girls…If the opposite happened then sth’ s wring right) he scolded us for running only 6 rounds. He said that every round we do, we do for our lungs and heart (which is quite true). and that we should exercise after PE lessons.(which is true as well) Then he said that he runs 7 times a week. I mean DUH… He’s a PE TEACHER!!! After 3 pm they have seriously nothing to do. No lessons to plan, no work to mark, no nothing. So? Go run lor…US on the other hand…Have homework, CCA, projects, meetings, outings…Er…not much time for extra PE… …And he accuses us for not doing our own exercise. HELLO, there’s something called CCA!!! We go for TRAINING sessions, GYM workouts. Is he blind or blind? Haiz, enuf about the bugger… Today’s PE lesson was crap anyway. Run first play later. Okay, no problem. I chiong 1.6 km first… 7 minutes. Shit…after that no energy to run liao, so just jog the other 2 rounds. And I gave up doing chin-ups, too tough. I can’t pull myself up. then after the run and the scolding went to play basketball… …basketball…OF ALL THINGS TO DO!!! basketball, there’s BADMINTON, FLOORBALL and soccer. but of all things BASKETBALL??? then throughout the game  just camp at one spot lor…haha, that’s y I decide to change my nick to Shadow Camper instead of Shadow Raider. I still like Raider…Haiz, use both lah…
Funny thing was that our PE teacher was standing beside the court and he squat like some tua pek gong. Super hilarious. After the game he said that 50% and 20% of the guys and girls respectively can play, so he will consider a PE course on Basketball. WTH??? Great, I want badminton.
 
Then today was Sport’s Day heats. Guess what. I’m LAST for 1500m event. Running against the IP2s and the faster IP1s, just did myself a favour man… Oh well, new motto
Last but definitely not the least. Do yourself a favour. at least I got a new personal best of 6:19.01 seconds… 🙂

Another dull day…

Yoz, I’m back in action…with a thoat infection. Heck, second time this year…AND IT’S ONLY MARCH!!! Wat’s happening to my immune system??? Do I have AIDS? Haha, can’t be, if not I would have been killed by the throat infection long ago. Anyway I had it since thursday. Thank God Sailing prac was cancelled, if not I might have passed out on the boat. Seriously thank God…
Somehow I was compelled to eat Bak Kwa and biscuits and that worsened my condition. But hey, I didn’t know it was a throat infection, I just thought it was just some fever, no sore throat no nothing, just a mild fever of 37.5. AND i clearly remember my father’s friend who was a doctor saying that Bak Kwa is good for you if you have a cold. So I ate lor… Anyway some might be wondering WHY THE HEC* do I still HAVE Bak Kwa???!!! Simple reason: because I DIDN’T EAT IT!!! Hahaz, since CNY, it’s still good but just as damaging to the throat. Anyway now I’m stuck at home losing my voice (haha, haven’t found it yet) and fever-ing at home…some grammar but hey, it’s a blog. I can do ANYTHING I want. Muahahaha and no one is going to stop me. I can type with my elbows too. nmhdmjdfnn d fc ndxn smnd ds nkkcfc dsrdd haha, bet u ppl can’t do that right? I mean WHO can actually come up with the exact combination of nmhd…..? Haha, only me.
Oh wel, since I’m stuck at home I can’t go for Op.EC 2 right? So sad…I rlly wanted to go but look what happened…I’m gonna curse Bak Kwa for the rest of the year (and stop in time for next year’s CNY). Anyway those who were going had a "surprise" for me. They cancelled the whole Operation and turned up at my house!!! What a pleasant surprise. Thanks for coming, and brightening up my day. Although my voice was hoarse I still found a way to talk to you guys. Thank God again.
anyway just a little account on what happened at my house. Cynthia and Yining were giggling at my childhood photos. How shameful right? "doesn’t look like you!!" was their catchphrase for the day. And for the guys of course it was hit the console time… I just figured out that Nivek is a terrible pilot if you invert the controls and Kenny enjoys killing Marines in Halo 2. Sadist right? After our gaming session was lunch. Yupp, lunch at my house. FOC. =) Then we talk cock till 3. Cynthia left early so she missed the ultimate joke of the TCS (talk cock session). We told Yining about the time we asked Caitlin the question about fried rice. Did you know that you can just take rice from the rice bin and pour it into the wok and fry it to get fried rice? Yining was smart to say that you can’t do that. But she said something else,"I thought you have to add water first?" That had us rolling around in laughter…After that was mostly VS talk and I think we left her out. feel abit guilty…
anyway thanks guys for coming and making me feel valued and treasured. Thanks a dozen multiplied by a dozen squared….